My Most Romantic Memory #MFRWauthor #Bloghop

Hi, everyone!

Welcome back to Week 19 of the MFRW Author Blog's 52-Week Blog Challenge.

This week, the topic is: My Most Romantic Memory.

Is it cheating or bad form to participate when you don't have an answer?

I hope not, because I'm thinking -- I joined this year's challenge hop, so I must participate regardless.

Also, I don't want anyone to think I'm being lazy or facetious because it is beyond pathetically true!

I have No Memory of any Romantic Memory, and yes, I was married once and have two, grown children to prove it.

So, what am I supposed to say this week?

One of the big reasons why I write Romance is because I have never experienced true romance.

I married someone I practically grew up with and was close friends with in middle and part of high school, so it kind of just happened.

Yes, my ex bought me things, but not just because, and often quite grudgingly, including my birthday and for Christmas.

Eventually, it boiled down to an annual Prime Rib dinner somewhere and that was it for the year.

There were plenty of red flag moments in our relationship, so it is entirely my fault for being miserable and unloved.

It was a mistake I regret with all my heart, but at least I have my two children.

Every guy I ever dated treated me pretty badly, expected far more than I was willing or ready to offer, and then dumped me when I didn't put out.

I don't recall ever dating a guy who wasn't interested in me for anything other than sex, and as the days turned to weeks with no gratification (because I always knew), things got ugly and we'd break up.

Some made me laugh and I thought it was good, and others took me to a lot of nice and interesting places on dates, which I thought was good.

But, there was always something between us to make it awkward, irritating, or just plain wrong.

No flowers, jewelry, balloons in the trunk, surprise party, or exotic trip for me!

***

One guy I was seeing came over on Christmas morning to show me what he'd bought... a box of Irish Setter puppies.

I was so excited, thinking one of them was for me!

He said, "Nah, I just wanted to show you what I got my Ma," and then he left!

... no gift for me. Not even a card! (and, I refunded the Christmas gift I'd bought him!)

Another guy I dated bought me the most gorgeous aquamarine ring.

I was stunned and didn't know what to say or do besides stare at the huge rock for a time.

I did thank him, of course, but I also asked what it was for since it wasn't my or his birthstone.

He told me "Just Because" and left it at that, but on our very next date night, he had turned into someone I no longer knew.

Possessive, bossy, irrational, and like a Mr. Hyde.

I took off the ring, handed it to him, and hailed a cab.

***

I hope this isn't too personal, but...

Inside my rocky, one-sided marriage, there came a time when my Romantic Memory finally arrived in the form of realizing what True Love means.

My husband was out on business while I was at home with the two babies.

We lived on a main road, and it was after 10 p.m. that I was in the living room watching TV waiting for him to get home when I heard the loudest, most horrific car crash I'd ever heard before.

No screeching tires... just one car slamming into another car at 45 miles per hour.

I jumped out of the rocking chair, peeked through the blinds, and was horrified to see that my husband's vehicle was turned sideways in front of the house.

Without thinking or caring, I ran out of the house and into the street, weeping and with my heart pounding in my chest and my throat.

Husband's eyes were open, but I could tell he wasn't okay, so I tried to open the door and it wouldn't budge.

Neighbors started coming out of their houses, and the young guy in the car he'd hit (after being rear-ended into oncoming traffic) got out and started SCREAMING at me.

Finally, my husband turned to look at me, and there was blood streaming down one side of his face.

It was my turn to scream.

I was frantic, telling people I couldn't open the door but that he was hurt.

I was pounding on the door's window, screaming for him to get out of the car.

He just sat there staring at me.

Eventually, the police and ambulance and fire truck arrived, a neighbor went into my house in case either of my two babies woke up (which they hadn't, thank heavens).

Husband was able to get out of the car on his own once they'd pried the door open, and after a time, it was clear that the man driving behind him was drunk and hadn't applied the brakes when he rear-ended husband, which sent husband into oncoming traffic because he was stopped to turn left into his own driveway.

He needed hospitalization for an injury to his left leg, was on crutches for a while, and needed bed rest for a few days.

I am being thoroughly honest when I say I knew, at that moment in time, that I was truly in love with him.

That I didn't want to see him hurt or missing or gone.

As he'd recovered, he wanted to have sex, and I was more than willing to oblige, and not to be disgusting, but it was marvelous.

First time, really.

But, within SECONDS of it ending, he pushed me off the bed and slapped me so hard my ear rang and I couldn't hear for a while because it hurt so bad.

In shock, I stared at him in disbelief and confusion.

He looked at me like I was poison and snarled at me that if I got pregnant, he'd leave me, that it was my fault it happened (sex) and there was no way in hell he was going to be "sticking around" any longer than he had to as it was.

And, in that instant, my Romantic Memory of true love had turned to dust, and hatred.

It was over even if we had another two years together before he finally made good on his word to not have to stick around any longer than he had to or apparently wanted to do.

***

No opportunity to experience Romantic Memories when romance and interest and real love aren't part of the equation.

SO!

When I write my Contemporary Romance... or even my up-coming Fantasy Romance novels, my heroines are a bit like me.

Abused, set aside, non-entity types who need to figure out what the hell is wrong (with them) and then plow forth with the intention of finding THE man who actually will see them for who they are, WANT to see them for who they are, and who is the real one for them.

And know how to be Romantic for the sake of true romance.

And, sometimes I get really angry with the scenario and insist there is nothing at all wrong with the heroine, and that she is simply surrounded by a bunch of assholes who wouldn't recognize treasure if God Himself came down and pointed it out!

LOL

My heroines know what they want, in other words, and until it lands in their lap, they're not satisfied and walk through life with the boxing gloves on, ready to duke it out with anyone who pushes them too far.

Once she finds him, he's more than willing and able to shower her with Romantic because he's truly interested in Romance.

With her.

I never had the opportunity, so why not create fictitious characters who can get the job done?

Please scroll down to the LinkyLink tool and click on the next in line to discover what their Most Romantic Memory is.

Blogging is an opportunity for authors to connect with readers. Despite being writers, blogging is an entirely different style of writing and often stumps us. To help our authors blog consistently, thoughtfully and with purpose, Marketing for Romance Writers is announcing the 2018 Blog Challenge. Each week, authors use our writing prompt to create a meaningful blog post. We'll be posting every Friday... join us as often as possible.
All authors with blogs are welcome to participate.